It is not easy for people that are obese to change their eating habits. The person has become obsessed with food and only through a super-human effort can eating habits be changed. Food and lots of it have become a way of life. The markets are full of the most delicious foods, and their variety is overwhelming. Once sampled it is almost impossible to give them up. It is easier for dope addicts to break their addiction than for a person to change their eating habits. The lives of people who are obese are seldom discussed or written about. People only want to hear about or look at beautiful people. The obese have become invisible in the media, and the show rooms in the fashion industry allow only slim men and women to enter them. The clothing shops seldom carry large sizes and even if they did a heavy person has lost the desire to try them on. If they are single, finding a good mate is next to impossible, most have to spend their lives in loneliness. Even those that have close family ties still are lonely and have little self esteem. The average person has no sympathy for people that are obese, they think dieting is easy, and the over weight person is at fault. But that is not true; the struggle to lose weight can be won by some, but is difficult for others.

Over eating is the main cause of being over weight. Less food equals less weight. The media is full of dieting programs that promise its followers that they will lose weight. A few of them are helpful. There are some people who were over weight and have dieted successfully. They are now happier with themselves and are no longer an eyesore to others. The new life they lead is suddenly full of helpful people and smiling faces. Now that they have realized the importance of a good appearance, few of them will ever let themselves become heavy again

Obese people have a wide range of problems; most of them are caused by being overweight. Their negative appearance puts them in a class of people who are trapped in a social and emotional hell. Because of their eating disorder some psychiatrists consider them to be dysfunctional, and also mentally ill. If the condition is severe enough doctors say that they should be given federal disability payments. It is hard for a heavy person to get a low cost life or health insurance policy, which is because overweight people are seldom healthy. Statistics show that being over weight takes ten years off a person's life. Job Interviewers give the edge to those that keep their weight down. They feel that a person who can't control their eating habits is a poor hiring choice. They also feel that the good appearance of a firm's employees adds to the stature of the company Dieting has not helped and you will always be heavy. How can you learn to deal with your weight problem? The first thing to do is accept the fact that fat is not beautiful and that you have to live with it. A dwarf never says that short is beautiful but learns to accept the limitations nature imposed, and goes on from there to find a good life. It is no different with a person that is over weight. If you accept your limitations you will be in a position to improve yourself socially and financially. Another thing to be aware of is that nobody will love your fat except a rare individual. So stop looking for fat lovers--- it is a waste of time.

If you are over weight and looking for a job, opportunity is limited. There are ten slim applicants for every decent job. The best strategy in that case is to humble your self and be willing to work long hours for less pay. A boss is always looking for a bargain and you will be it. Once you get the job work hard and that job will be yours. Let the slim job seekers run their own race and you run yours.

Getting a mate without being slim is an art in itself. Again the fat becomes a disadvantage that has to be overcome. If a guy is over weight he can be generous and most women will be happy to date him. If he is cheap he will have to stay home alone. A heavy woman will have to offer something besides her fat to a guy. It is usually hot love. It would help if she had other special qualities outside of her bedroom. Fat people are not attracted to one another because of the heavy layers of fat that they carry. If you look deep into their relationship you will see other reasons that have nothing to do with their weight

It's a give and take world and without a good appearance you better learn how to give a lot. There is no other way. If you stand firm and say that being heavy has little to do with the way people look at you, get ready for a cruel awakening. Being heavy is an eye sore and you have to accept that as a fact. Flexibility and compromise are the magic words that are needed if an over weight person is going to get a shot at having a decent life. http://360.yahoo.com/melvin_polatnick

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Retired and single recluse