"Our happily ever after was about to begin," coos Eva (Mandy Moore), the film's just-married marriage therapist (really), whose new life with Charlie (Kellan Lutz) is off to a rocky start -- not because of Charlie, but because her parents (James Brolin, Jane Seymour) are getting a divorce. No one's objecting except Eva, whose world is rocked.

While the pic is never more than a formulaic, how-do-we-fix-this domestic procedural, those things it never quite explains do generate some intrigue: Why has Dad become an Orthodox Jew, lighting his home with candles on the Sabbath? How the heck did Eva become a marriage counselor? And, most glaringly, what's the deal with Charlie and his copper-colored dye job, waxed torso and gym-rat physique? It would appear that Eva has bigger problems on her hands than her parents' divorce.

Performances range from wooden to hysterical, and it's largely due to Mulroney's inexperience behind the camera -- the dropped-jaw reaction shots and tendency to overplay all seem uncharacteristic for most of these thesps. The one bright exception is Brolin, who may be inhabiting a weird role, but at least Dad is specific, well defined and unlike anything the actor has done before. One doesn't have to like the character, but Brolin admirably defies expectations and disappears into the part.

Circling the principals, and apparently showing some love for Mulroney, are Christopher Lloyd and Colleen Camp as two freakazoid marriage counselors, and the voice (during a phone call to Eva) of Julia Roberts, who once upon a time starred with Mulroney in "My Best Friend's Wedding."

Love, Wedding, Marriage is a romantic comedy starring Mandy Moore as a marriage counselor and newlywed who must save her parents' marriage, and perhaps her own.

Did that sound like the kinda inane garbage the studio would write about the film? That's what I was going for. Nailed it. *high five

Anyways, Moore plays Eva, the marriage counselor who lives in a bit of a fantasy and doesn't understand that marriage is hard, and that all men lie, and we're all dogs, and we'll cheat on you for someone hotter or if you get fat, or maybe if we think we can get away with it, or maybe just if we get the opportunity, or have enough money after all your stupid purchases to pay for a prostitute.

Right, so right after her wedding, Eva's parents announce that they want to get divorced. Also, she realizes that she married Kellan Lutz, who is IN Twilight but isn't Edward or Jacob. Team… loser? Of course, the film looks kinda bland, but pretty, like Mandy Moore, so it should all turn out okay. Or maybe she'll get bone cancer and die when her legs give out while skiing. How big a shocker would that be

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