If you had asked me 2 years ago whether I believed that being attracted to
women was wrong or bad, I would have laughed.
Of course, attraction to women is a natural and healthy expression of the male
species!
But when I came up against an edge of creating attraction with women, I realized
there was a subtle place where I was not fully connected to my desire for the
women that I was relating with.
As I explored this further, I found out that a small, previously unconscious
part of me actually felt ashamed of being attracted to women.
As Decker (the other founder of AMP) facilitated me through this process, I
went deeper, and old memories suddenly surfaced in my awareness-- at age 6 I
used to cut out pictures of women in bras and panties from the Sears catalogs
and keep them in a paper bag under the couch. I loved looking at them!
One day, my mom found them and told me that I was not allowed to do that. At
that age, I developed a limiting belief.
A limiting belief that it was not okay to be sexually attracted to women!
When I got this realization, I suddenly experienced a huge emotional release,
as all the repressed emotions I had been holding since I was 6 years old came
to the surface... and with someone to facilitate me through this process, I
was able to challenge and resolve this limiting belief that I did not even realize
that I had.
Now, I feel more whole and complete in myself, and more capable than ever of
unapologetically owning my attraction--and it has made a huge difference in
my ability to create attraction with women.
Get this: Unless we can address both the conscious and unconscious
beliefs in ourselves, we are going to be run by them, often without
even being aware of their existence, until we experience some loss of power.
That's part of why I love the work that we do. By grounding in a strong "Inner
Game" foundation, we can align our beliefs with our values, behaviors,
and abilities such that we are "congruent".
From this place, relating with women comes naturally and easily.
Next time you come across a place where you are experiencing a loss of power
or not getting the results you want, whether it's in meeting new women or in
an existing relationship, ask yourself the question:
What beliefs do I have about this? How do I feel whenever I express them? What
beliefs may be holding me back? When did I start believing this about myself?
Often just having an awareness of the limiting belief and questioning the truth
of it can be enough to resolve these beliefs. For others, it may take using
a technology such as that used in NLP, EFT, the AMP course, hypnotism, etc.
Either way, you've gotten closer to the root of some of the most fundamental
obstacles that get in the way of our relating with women.
In the meantime, if you're looking for an opportunity to deepen and strengthen
your Inner Game, you can check us out at Authentic
Man Program.
In the meantime, watch out for those Limiting Beliefs!
About the Author
Bryan Bayer is co-founder and facilitator of the Authentic Man Program (AMP), committed to supporting men in having authentic, flourishing, kick-ass relationships with women. He specializes in helping men overcome their "inner game" sticking points with women. http://www.AuthenticManProgram.com
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