Funny quotes about life - "Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have."—Will Rogers

Funny quotes about money - I am a nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I am perfect.

Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice.

I am planning to be more spontaneous in the future.

You can go anywhere you want if you look serious and carry a clipboard.

"I'm not upset that your lamb followed you to school, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you."

"Love is temporary insanity curable by marriage." - Ambrose Bierce

It is assumed that when anyone gets into debt, the fault is entirely and always the fault of the lender.

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

Funny quotes about life - "Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping."—Bo Derek

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Funny quotes about money - "If your left leg was Easter, and your right leg was Christmas, would i be able to meet you in-between the holidays?" - Josh Longden

If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.

I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either.

"I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me." - Woody Allen.

"Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed."—George Burns

Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak.

If you can count your money then you are not really a rich man.

I am having an out of money experience.

Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.

Money is not the only thing, it's everything.

I want to die while asleep like my grandfather, not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.

Quotes about life - "I believe in dragons, fairies, good men and other mythical creatures!"

The more you learn, the more you know,the more you know, the more you forget the more you forget, the less you know, So.. why learn.

"Business is the art of extracting money from another man's pocket without resorting to violence."—Max Amsterdam

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