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Communication: Confused Britain

(Sat May 14th, 2011, by Steve Terblans)


Do we know our right from our left? Well we should know, although after years of driving with my wife navigating I still harbour some doubts. However, in the main we know our left from our right. It's one of those things we're taught from a very early age. We develop to be either right or left-handed. Many customs and practices have developed from this. We wear our watches on our left if we're right-handed. We serve from the right and clear from the left if we're waiters (or is it the other way round?). We right from left to right, from top to bottom. It's strange that half the world drives on the left side of the road, and the other half on the right. I'd be fascinated to know how this developed. Anyway, the point is that in most things in life we definitely know left and right and how to apply each.

That is with the exception of walking down the street. Let me explain. I have lived in many countries and visited still many more and the unwritten law seems to be that the rules of the pavement mirror the rules of the road. We walk the same way we drive. This is certainly true with all the former colonies of the British Empire. We drive on the left and overtake on the right. We walk on the left and pass on the right, but not in Britain.

The English are deeply confused on this subject. I have thrown the question open at many gatherings and without fail the audience is split 50:50 or 60:40. You simply have to walk down a street to see the chaos in action. Everyone walks everywhere. In London when it rains the brolly brigade appear and that's when interesting becomes dangerous; hundreds of bobbing brollies on both sides of the pavement.

Now I have my own theory as to why this is. Yes, as with many of our ills it is the fault of the EU; probably the French if Al Murray is to be believed. Just because they drive on the wrong side of the road they expect us to. The problem originates in the tube stations. Here there are hundreds of escalators. The standard rule is "Stand to the right; pass on the left." This is totally wrong. I assume the rules are embedded somewhere on the machinery which are probably imported from Europe, so it's easier to follow the embedded instructions than change them; so most people having become conditioned by the escalators arrive in the street with the same mindset. Others switch to driver mode, and the result is absolute chaos.

I often wonder if this ever applied to flight. Do Spitfires land on the left and meserschmidts on the right.

Food for thought.

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